A Heart Tattoo

 If I could tattoo my heart, I would want it to read:

“Though the fig tree should not blossom, nor fruit be on the vines,
the produce of the olive fail and the fields yield no food,
 the flock be cut off from the fold and there be no herd in the stalls,
yet I will rejoice in the Lord; I will take joy in the God of my salvation”

(Hab3:17–18).

I'll try not to over dramatize this- and say simply that when I read this verse for the first time 2 weeks ago I felt the Lord was speaking to me in a beautifully encouraging and personal way.  

You see, the last month has been a difficult one for us.  After 6-months of waiting without a single "fig blossom or fruit on the vine" we have had 2 recent "olive produce failures..."  We were made aware of 2 potential baby girls expected to be born in the summer.  One situation was a very sad and complicated, and the other seemed pretty straight forward.  We were hopeful and prayerful.  We were obedient and said we were willing to parent both babies...  Unfortunately, neither situation materialized.

And yet I know, without a single doubt, my God loves me enough to die in my place and in THAT I will rejoice!

Even if the Lord never gives me anything I ever ask him for, ever again, in my salvation I will rejoice!  Even when my heart feels heavy, when I am disappointed, when I am tired of waiting, when I am discouraged or grumpy I will take joy in the perfection that is to come when I see him face to face.  

Amen.