Big Girl N is 1!

Meet Little Miss N!  This sweet baby girl turned a year old on Sunday! 
Isn't she adoreable? 

In just this year she has grown into such a sweet little personality!  I can't wait to see what the Lord has in store for her as he grows her into a woman after his own heart.  Maybe one day (a LONG time from now!) it will be my pleasure to shoot this baby's bridal portraits!  :)

But for now onto her 1st birthday shoot! 

Enjoy!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Gracias, Familia Jones, por todo su amor y ayuda! 

Love you guys!

Another step in obedience, filled with JOY

As a sweet friend said today was “a big chapter in an amazing story- like a climax page!”

Today we met “L”- the precious woman that has chosen us to parent her baby. To say that Niles and I were nervous doesn’t really cover it. I stressed about what to wear, how to do my make-up, what to talk about- what NOT to talk about…. the list goes on and on.

We dropped off the boys, prayed in the car and after a quick walk in the blazing heat we walked into the restaurant and saw L for the first time. This was a moment we had prayed for for months, and a moment covered in prayer by our family and friends- and it was blessed.In true southern fashion we hugged this precious woman just seconds after meeting her- and it was awesome.

L shared with us how nervous she was too! How all she wanted was for us to like her. How she couldn’t decide how to wear her hair and how she’d made a poor earing choice. :) I think I loved her instantly.After our initial hellos it was time to order our lunch (lunch?? Who can eat at time like this??!). Anyways we made our orders and just started chatting. We talked about our nerves, what we liked to eat, what we all did as hobbies, where we like to vacation…etc….etc… It was a beautiful flowing conversation without any awkwardness at all. There is no explanation for the ease in our conversation other than the prayers of our friends and family. For that we are ever so grateful!

We asked L if she had named her baby or referred to her by any name in her mind. She was hilarious and told us she actually has an app on her phone with 5,000 baby names- ALL OF WHICH she has reviewed! So it was obvious to us that names mattered to her. She gave us 2 girl names she really liked- one of which “happens” to be the last name of one of our “heroes in the faith!” If you know our boys, they are both named after the last name of 2 heroes in the faith- a perfect name!  It was one of many confirming moments.

At some point in the conversation when we were talking about “Ruth” L gave us a smiling “warning” that she had only had one ultrasound and that she had heard of people whose “ultra sounds were wrong!”.

To be honest my mind started racing at the point! For the first time I realized that a “girl” prediction on an ultrasound was not a guarantee! All ultra sound technicians are not “created equally” and babies have a tendency to hide their “parts”… both the girl ones AND the BOY ones!! So in that moment I had a million thoughts, some of which were- oh my goodness! This baby, this baby that we have just assumed would be a girl because that’s what an ultra sound said MIGHT ACTUALLY BE A BABY BOY! What are we going to do?

But the thing is- that  this uncertainty will be the case with any birth mom we are matched with! Unless we are matched with a mother that has already had her baby, we will not know for sure whether it is a boy or girl until they are born!  And from what I remember little girl ultrasounds are the most likely to be misread!

ANOTHER CRAZY- FAITH BUILDING- TWIST!

One more time when the Lord asks us the question- will you be open handed with this baby? Will you move even in uncertainty? Will you trust that Romans 8:28 is true?

28 And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good,[a] for those who are called according to his purpose.

SO! So onward we go! We LOVE L and feel honored that she has chosen us to parent her baby- whether it is a boy or a girl! We will love and pray for this baby knowing the Lord knows how many hairs she/he will have and exactly what her/his name should be!  L will potentially have another ultrasound at her appointment next week… but ultra sounds are not a guarantee! So the Lord is again asking us to move in faith, showing us just one step at a time.

We will continue to pray for and ask for our “Ruth”- until a time when the Lord shows us we are actually having a “Boaz” ;)!

A different kind of butterfly

Today the butterflies I am experiencing aren't the beautiful and brightly colored kind- I'm excited and a bit nervous!  

Today is the day we meet the mother that has chosen us- today we meet "L."  We will meet her with our social worker and share our lives over lunch. 

Our desire is for her to feel our love for her and her baby.  For her to know our admiration of her selfless decision.  For her to feel confirmation in her choice of our family. And above all for the name of the Lord to be high and lifted up!

We ask for your prayers for the Holy Spirit to guide our conversation and ease all of our nerves.  

Eagerly waiting to become a family of 5!

Dulcius Ex Asperis

So, as I was saying, this past Friday Maria and I had our legal briefing with our adoption attorney. It was one of those conversations that brings out all the what-if's and this-and-that-could-happens. We've spent this past weekend reflecting on things and praying about this baby girl. Here's where we are: 


There's nothing easy about redemption. Emotionally, legally, spiritually, practically, nothing is easy. Otherwise it wouldn't need redeeming in the first place. Something has gone astray somewhere. Circumstances or consequences, it doesn't really matter; the fact remains that there is a baby girl that will be here around August 13. Yep, that soon. However, we can see that it really has been just enough time for us to prepare our hearts, funds, and home for what lies ahead. We are going to continue to pursue Ruthie in this adoption knowing the risks and the difficulty that lies ahead because we believe that the LORD wills it, and that our hearts are filled with love for her already. She is more valuable than the tears, tanks of gas, and tension that we will have to endure in the coming months.


Since you asked, yes, the Ferguson Clan does date back to the late 12th century in Scotland. The Sons of MacFergus back then had their tartans, coat of arms, and a nifty motto: Dulcius Ex Asperis or for those of you not update to par on your latin: Sweeter after difficulty. I know this because I am a profound historian... or researching tattoo ideas. Either way, as I was writing back our agency about our decision to move forward, this motto really resounded for me. Mostly what it echoed is the truth that as we endure hardship, trusting the sovereignty of God, He becomes sweeter to us than before. 


When David was on the run, and apparently quite fearful of his consequences and circumstances, he wrote Psalm 34. You can read it here. Go ahead, I'll wait.


Don't get David wrong. Thing's like safety and riches weren't what was sweet to him. And it surely wasn't his difficulty. "Taste and see that the LORD is good!" It is Yahweh (LORD) that is the prize. It is He who becomes sweeter through our difficulty. Why? Because it's only by his loving mercy and crazy grace that we can do anything at all. Likewise, we don't what you get us wrong, either. So here goes:


The Fergusons have only been able to discern our call, move in faith, raise funds, pursue Ruthie because of the LORD's grace. Otherwise, we'd by spiritually deaf to any call, paralyzed by fear, unmotivated, and ultimately unfruitful in our efforts - or worse, prideful of "all we've accomplished."


No, in fact, it is the sovereign, merciful, gracious Lord of the universe, Yahweh, who has done everything, and has become more sweet to us than ever through it all. The next several months will be difficult, but then again redemption is never easy, but it is sweet. 

Fundraising Fun (x's 2)

We would like to invite you all to join us tonight for some fundraising fun!

Help us and the Carroll family offset the cost of adoptions, hear great music, and buy cool things!!

We would love to see all of you this evening!

Master of the Wind

Oh what an amazing God we serve! I am STILL blown away by the loving kindness he showed us on Monday (the most emotionally charged day of my life). 

It has indeed been a whirlwind of an adventure but the Lord has showed up over and over again to remind us that HE is mighty and HE controls even the strongest wind. 

His swiftness to respond to my cries for mercy and peace in my heart reminds me of the story in the Gospels where the disciples are out at sea with Jesus and a storm arises. Jesus was asleep in the boat and the disciples (like me) were FREAKING OUT. Everything looked and felt out of control; the water was coming in the ship. There was nothing they could do to stop it.  After enough fruitless freak out the disciples ran to wake Jesus.

 And he awoke and rebuked the wind and said to the sea, “Peace! Be still!” And the wind ceased, and there was a great calm. Mark 4:39

There was no part in that story where Jesus was not in command of the wind. He allowed it to blow- until the moment he told it to stop.

Neither is there any part of our adoption journey where Jesus has not been in complete command.  He has allowed the wind to blow- both opening and closing doors.  He has moved in HIS church to rally around our family.  He has shown us financial provision and given us opportunities to share what the Lord is doing with strangers and friends alike.   He has shown us that he will give us the faith and courage we need to face uncertainty.

We pray that the Lord will give us faith and we will not fear as the journey continues. Amen!

A Story only the Lord could author

Hold on folks, it’s going to be a bumpy ride.

I have a story to tell you, a story that only God could write.

This afternoon, around 2:00, I received a phone call from the Charleston agency we were expecting to hear from on Wednesday. I held my breath, said the quickest prayer of my life (Lord!), and ran out the back door to take the call on the back deck. Denise informed me that the placement committee had decided to meet over the weekend and that she wanted to let me know they had chosen another family.

Hope was not going to be a Ferguson after all.

As she described the family they had chosen I realized what a perfect fit they were. The selection committee chose an African American couple, that had no other children and had a pediatrician in the family. What a beautiful provision for sweet baby Hope! Two parents that could dote on her with their full attention and provide her the necessary medical care should any special needs arrive. They were the perfect fit.

Now I could see how the other family was a perfect fit- but that certainly didn’t mean I FELT like she should grow up with them!

No, I just felt like I forgot how to breathe.

The little baby I was already beginning to love was not coming home.

So after I hung up with Denise, I decided to call my mom and then Niles. Through tears I briefly shared our disappointment. Niles lovingly assured me that we would be OK and I believed him- but I just didn’t feel like it. I then called a couple other close friends to share the sad news. With each call my heart was encouraged by our family in Christ that cried when I cried and grieved when I grieved. They prayed for us and promised to give us space to grieve but said they would be minutes away should we need anything.

With each call the news became more and more difficult to share so I was preparing to send a text to share the news with many that had been praying with us.  Well the thought of that was more than I could handle, so I called Niles and asked him to please come home. Of course he said yes and was on his way in minutes.

Then I just got the idea to call Sharon, the director of our agency in Rock Hill. She was the one that had given us the information about baby Hope. She and I had spoken over the weekend as well while I was a little stir-crazy in my waiting and needed advice. Sharon answered right away and I told her who I was (I’m sure she didn’t recognize my voice with all the snotty, sniffles and tears!). I told her that the other agency had decided to place Hope with another family. I told her how happy I was for Hope but how sad I was for us. She listened so patiently and comforted me. I then started to tell her of my plans to give our portfolio to a local attorney to see if he too could help us look for our baby… then she said:

“Honey, I have news for you that is probably going to change everything.”
To which I replied- “alright I’m ready!”

Then she said
I’m just walking in the door from an appointment with a birth mother and...

SHE PICKED YOU.


I literally fell on the grass in the back yard! It was as though I was in a TWISTED dream and I wasn’t sure what was real and what wasn’t! Turns out that just an hour before (when I was getting the call about Hope’s new family!) the birth mother had chosen our family for her baby! She was excited about us for a number of reasons but the one Sharon shared with me was because I was Puertorican! As it turns out, she is part Puertorican as well!!

Side note- if you’ve been following this blog since the beginning you know that the FIRST place we felt led to look to adopt from was Puerto Rico! Now I see why that didn’t work out- she was part Puertorican but living in York County!

So from the beginning of my grief to this incredible twist the Lord allowed just over an hour! What immense grace and mercy- what a gift.  A beautiful picture of Psalm 91:4- covering us with his feathers and sheltering us with his wings!

There is so much more to tell, so much more to process. But for now I wanted you all to know that your prayers were answered. Baby Hope is going to grow up in the home the Lord perfectly and sovereignly chose for her. Your prayers for her healing have been heard and the Lord has MOVED AND HEALED! I am convinced that if Niles and I had not been in the running for her placement there might not have been anyone to pray for that sweet baby. And thanks to all of you I am sure hundreds of thousands of prayers were lifted up on her behalf. Thank you for your obedient and faithful prayers. Thank you for hoping with us and for your encouragements. I pray that our story sheds light on the awesomeness of GOD- on his goodness and his steadfast love of his people. To him be ALL GLORY AND HONOR!

And now we have the added joy of being “expectant parents” again! I promise more details soon but for now I will leave you with a tease-

Our baby’s mother has a scheduled c-section on Monday, August 13th!
That’s 49 days from now :)